SPARKS 22

I open my eyes and I see Emily staring at me a couple of inches away from my face. I jump on the bed “God Emily! You should never ever do that to people! I might have a heart attack”
She laughs and starts jumping on the bed. “The sun is up already! Let’s go out! Let’s go out!”
I swear in Italian in a very low voice, even though I know she cannot understand and check my watch. My head falls back on my pillow “It’s only 5.30, why don’t you lie down by me and see if we can sleep a little longer?”
She seems to be thinking about it, then she makes herself comfortable and she’s asleep in less than 5 minutes.
While I can’t, of course. I lay awake and think about Howard. How crazy those last days have been and how different I’ve felt since he’s entered my life taking it by storm. Beside me the clock ticks endlessly, slowly on. I doze off every once in while for a few minutes but I just cannot relax. So after changing my position a million of times, rolling on my back and on my stomach I decide to get up and have some breakfast.
The moment I open the door of the kitchen two strong arms take mine and pin me against the wall. “Why did it take you so long to come down?” and he places a kiss on my nose “I’ve been waiting for you for almost an hour” kisses my cheek
I laugh “I’m sorry Mr. Donald, I didn’t know we were supposed to meet. I clearly remember the most boring speech ever about taking things slow, people watching and other nonsense though. I’ve been thinking about it and you’re not as hot as I thought.”
“Am I?” and nibbles my ear “I did some thinking too and I deliberated the whole waiting for tonight idea was pure, utter, complete bullshit. I came to your room to beg for forgiveness, and something more” he smirks “but Emily was sleeping in your bed. That is my spot! I claim it”
I laugh, “You’ll have to earn it my dear and FYI I have a job to do”
“Quit it” kisses the other cheek
“No need to. Dawn fired me the day she threw you out of her house. As of Monday I will be really unemployed, but extremely happy”
He’s suddenly serious and looks into my eyes “It’s all my fault. I’ll help you out, with anything you might need. It is so expensive to live in London. And you’ll have to pay a rent. I don’t want you to worry about a thing”
“I don’t. Believe me. There are so many things you don’t know about me and I want to tell you”
“Me first” and literally plunges his tongue into my mouth playing with mine *Heaven*. One soft kiss after another, lips touching then pulling back just out of reach before coming back in for another.

We hear voices of people coming in so I push him away and smile “behave now”
He doesn’t let go of my waist. Foreheads pressed against each other, noses touching, we’re looking into each other's eyes “Don’t worry, I’m here, I’ll take care of you. I mean it”
“No need to. I mean it more”
He looks at me puzzled, steps back the moment Dawn and Jason enter.
“MORNING GORGEOUS! And good morning to you too Dawn” he greets them and turns toward the stove “Coffee is on the way. It took me a while to figure out how to work this Italian coffee machine but I think I succeeded!”
“You mean I’m witnessing caffeine-free joyfulness?” Jason asks
Howard grins in reply and Jason starts yelling “BODY SNATCH! BODY SNATCH!”

Half an hour later Gary and the kids follow so we have breakfast and we head to the beach.
“Honey, are you coming with us?” Gary asks his wife
“No, there’s a thing a need to do, I’ll catch up with you later” and she looks at me like I’m a piece of dead meat. *Gulp*
We all walk to the beach; kids ahead of us asking Jason all sort of questions, Gary and me doing some small talk and Howard walking a couple of steps behind me. He doesn’t miss any chance he has to caress my back while I try to keep a natural conversation with Gaz. He’s in such a teasing mood this morning, I bet he had nightmares last night and he most definitely screamed my name.
The kids jump into the water while I place my sarong on the sand and I lay on my back.
Howard’s sitting a couple feet away from me, pretending to look at the kids playing and smiling mischievously.
I try not to stare at him but I cannot resist. I wear my sunglasses, hoping they will hide my eyes. I linger a glance at him, working my way up from his feet to his legs, his torso and his curly hair. And my weak mind starts imaging what he might look like stark naked. I blush *crap! Need to come up with disturbing picture, now. Gordon Brown dancing ‘Umbrella’. There you go!* I feel better until I look at his face and notice he is looking back at me. I blush and I turn the other way embarrassed about being caught. I can just imagine how much he must be laughing inside. My mobile rings and it is Julie “So? How is he naked?”
“Nice to hear from you. The weather is amazing”
“I don’t care! You can’t talk, can you?”
“Astute as usual”
“Ok, I will ask you very straight questions, one moan is yes and two moans is no”
I laugh and whisper “I’m in hell, he’s standing right by me and I cannot touch him”
“That is sooooo unfair”
“Tell me about it, he’s wearing a Speedo”
…..
“Are you there?”
“Hum hum”
“What are you doing?”
“Trying to catch my breath at the thought of him in a Speedo”
“My kingdom for the chance to rub sunscreen lotion on his body”
“What is it, Horny King Richard III?”
I laugh and that is the moment I realize he’s moved from his spot to come lying by me.
“Move woman, we’re sharing your sarong”
“Is that McHorny’s voice?” Julie asks
I moan, once
“2 words for you: full report” and she hangs up.
He’s lying on his stomach, right by me. His right hand casually circling around my belly button.
“Stop it, they could see us” *I hope you smart enough to understand I am kidding here*
“Gary and the kids are in the water; Jason is reading and he knows and all the others are on the boat trip to the Volcano Island. Besides, I saw the way you were looking at me before and I must say I felt diminished and embarrassed. I’m not your sex toy. You offended my dignity as a human being and I don’t know if I’ll ever be able to look at you the way I used to”
“You are so dramatic” and I move a little closer to him, sliding my index finger inside is Speedo, rubbing his thigh
“You didn’t believe a single word I said, did you?”
“I wasn’t even listening” and I smirk
“A dirty mind is a terrible thing to waste” and licks my earlobe while his hand starts playing with my bikini
Our hands entangle and I guess we’re both trying to think of a place we can go and hide when we hear Dawn yelling from afar “Hey guys! Look what I got!”
They all turn around but me and I hear
“HONEY! SURPRISE!”


I don’t need to turn around; I can hear little cracks opening along my body and my soul. Howard’s finger is still holding onto my bikini but his touch feels cold.
“Shit” he hisses
I just want to die. That’s it, can’t take it anymore. I close my eyes trying to hold my breath and begging my heart to stop beating.
A shadow casts over us, someone squatting behind my head. His hand slides quickly from my leg into the sarong.
Such a happy happy voice “I’ve missed you so much!” and a loud smooching sound follows.
“… Didn’t you have a wedding to go to? …” his voice is low and worried *about what I might feel or about the fact she might find out about him, and me? There’s no us, there will be no us*
“I know but Dawn has been calling me non-stop for the past 3 days until I agreed to come here. She was right! It’s an amazing island. Really! And I think it is about time we spend sometime together without kids around”
“… right …”
I can just imagine Dawn face right now. Me a week ago would have simply stood up and given her a piece of my mind, me today just wants to cry. I sit up straight on the sarong, struggling to control my emotions. I look at the sea in front of me and I stand up.
“Marie, let me introduce you to our nanny…” *you wan sneaky bitch, what else do you want from me? Enough Dawn, enough, I don’t have to take this from you* I don’t even bother to turn around, I loosely wave with my hand, walk to the water and dive in. Emily and Daniel call my name, I bet they want to play but I ignore them.
The water’s cold and it feels good on my skin, the salt is burning my eyes but I sort of enjoy the physical pain. Living should be like swimming, loving should be like swimming, breath in – stoke – breath out – stroke – breathe in. No sounds, no worries, no surprises, just the rhythm of my arms breaking the waves.
Gary is greeting her; Jason joins them when he sees me swimming “where is she going?”
He turns toward the direction Jason’s finger is pointing “what would I know?”
“She cannot think she can get all the way to the lighthouse, it’s almost a mile away. Is she a good swimmer?”
“Again, what would I know? All I can tell you is that my kids love her and my wife not so much”
Jason stares at Howard who looks away. He looks mortified and lost. For the first time Jay cannot understand what it’s really going through his mind.
“I better follow her”
“Why…” but good, bighearted Jason is already diving into the sea.
After many regular strokes I almost forget about Howard, I can see the rocks ahead of me, my eyes are burning. I reach one of them, finally able to rest and catch my breath. I’m worn out but I’m safe. They’re all far away. I climb the rocks cutting my feet, I don’t care. I find a nice spot, sit down and start sobbing hysterically. I’m just staying there when I hear a familiar voice saying “what the fuck! You are a bloody swimmer. I almost died to come to your rescue. And now we’re stranded on these rocks because there’s no way you’ll dump me here after I almost saved your life”
I turn to see Jason, panting heavily, struggling to sit down be me.
I keep crying, I don’t care about him, I didn’t ask for him to come.
He places a hand over my shoulder “Shush …I’m so sorry. I know what it is like; I feel the same way…”
My brain registers his words, I stop sobbing for a moment *oh my God, Jason Orange is gay! There’s no married lady, he’s in love with Howard too”
I wipe the tears from my face and I look at him puzzled.
“You’re crying because of my haircut, aren’t you? I cried too when the blind hairdresser was done with me. My head looks like a giant egg” and sighs
And I burst into a fit of laughter, looking at his fake sorry expression and I bury my face under his arm.
“Yes it does” I manage to say “tell me you didn’t pay him”
“I had to; I was the one who told him to cut them after all”
“Wimp, you should have sued his pants off”
“I didn’t tip him; it should teach him a lesson”
“Oh Jason…” and I hug him “would you please kill me? You’re the only one I know sweet enough willing to put an end to my misery”
He wraps his arms around me “You don’t really mean it”
“I thought I had been through enough for one year already. Then Howard came into my life. And I felt alive and happy and desired. I just cannot take any more pain, I’m serious”
He kisses my head “Let me tell you. You’re among the top three women in his life, and the other two are his daughters. It is meant to be.”
“So why isn’t he here instead of you? No cheap philosophical crap, there is no fate, there is no serendipity bullshit. It’s just people, and their relationships and I am the one left in a corner. I mean you know, doesn’t your queen have a king already?”
“How do you know?”
“What do you think?”
“Doug and his big mouth. I’ll kill him”
“Please do”
He holds me tighter “are you going to leave?”
“As soon as I get back ashore”, that’s it. I said it, I decided. I stand up and take his hand “coming with me?”
“I don’t think I can. I cannot really feel my legs yet” and pants
“I’ll follow you closely, if you need help just wave and I’ll rescue you”
“That’s just what a man likes to hear”, and stands up “but I don’t think you could do it, I’m too big for you”
“In that case we would give a new meaning to the expression drown one’s sorrows”
“For some reason it does not reassure me” and starts walking down, carefully placing one foot at the time.
“Don’t go that way Jason, it will take us forever. Come up here! Let’s climb up and jump!” and I move toward the top.
“You’re crazy, people die doing stupid staff like that, and we don’t know how deep the water is”
“Let’s find out” and I jump splashing into the crystal clear water. “Jay, is amazing! Come on! Jump!”
He’s standing on the rock, rubbing his forehead “if I hurt myself they’ll kill me, we have a tour to do”
“Give me a break! Nobody really cares about you! It’s not like you have any relevant role! Rumor has it they have already contacted Mr. Potato Head to replace you!” He gives me a killer look and jumps. The moment he hits the water and goes under it I feel his hand grabbing my leg and pulling me down with him.
I did not see it coming and I have no air in my lungs *Can’t breath… killed by Jason Orange, that is the most pathetic death ever*. I free myself from his grip and resurface coughing and trying to catch my breath. His face appears in front of mine laughing “he who laughs last laughs longer” he says.
“He who cannot sing should just dance and not pretend he can play the guitar!” I reply and start swimming to the shore.